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As I sit in my kitchen, glass of wine and my favorite music playing, I start to feel this dark cloud that has been hovering over me the last while, start to lift. It’s not that I have been depressed, just very unmotivated and tired… oh so tired. I try to fight it, but sometimes it’s better to just relax and rest until your mind and body are ready. I’ve been making lists on what I want to accomplish but when I come home, I get what I can get done. My boyfriend always reminds me to just let it go, shit will get done, and things will work out. So I listened this week. Just did what I could. 

I blame the weather and the time of year. Right now I wait for December to hit, which means seeing family and friends, lots of wine, lots of fishing and some time off. I should be embracing this down time before life gets hectic but I’m ready for the chaos and am feeling antsy. I love being with my friends and family. I love wine. I love this time of year.

I know last week I had said I was going to start working out this week but this heaviness I’ve been feeling got the best of me. I decided I’m going to start this fitness journey off slow like a fucking turtle. Since I was feeling physically unwell, my goal was to start drinking more water. Which I achieved. My next goal will be to walk 30 min a day 3 times a week. I’ve decided to do it this way because previously I have jumped in without a plan and pushed myself too hard too fast. I also recently realized how well things workout when you have a plan in place. My blog, for example, is something I planned for months before transitioning everything over and making changes. I want to succeed by this summer, to get rid of this sugar belly (I blame my addiction to sweets ha!) and finally reach a goal I have had for years. I am determined.

I have also realized that I stress myself out when I have too many goals going on so I have decided to stop thinking everything needs to be done like… yesterday and just take my time. Stop rushing. We live in such a face-paced, high-demanding life that it becomes overwhelming. My ONE goal is to focus on my fitness and getting the body that I have always wanted and with that, comes a stable and happy mind. After I complete that, my next goal will be getting my ass back to school. Even if it’s a class here and there, I need to start somewhere! This new approach is way less stressful, more thought out and realistic. 

But!!! December I will be rolling with the punches and enjoying life to the fullest. I made this a promise to myself starting last year that Decembers are for, no stress, no guilt, and no negative thoughts or feelings. Just complete gratitude for being able to spend time with my loved ones, make memories, and end this crazy, self-learning, chaotic, beautiful, gone-by-too-fast, kind of year, with a bang.

I hope everyone is ready for the Christmas season. Lend a helping hand when you can, even if it’s a small gesture, it’s a hard time a year for a lot of people. 

Lots of love.


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